i will wave with a smile.

the one week I have been spending in Bali,

was like a crash course,

met with a friend from a past,

who funnily and unexpectedly,

sent to deliver a message to me.

that it is alright to question life,

that it is alright to be weak,

that it is alright to be vulnerable,

that it is alright to make a change,

that it is alright to lose once in a while.

i am forever grateful,

to be sent such wonderful souls.

the luckiest on earth I feel,

to always feel taken care of.

so that I can move forward.

see,

life for me has been feeling like an endless circle.

i look for and look for the bigger purpose,

to the point I lost myself.

totally forgetting what was it I was looking for anymore.

but the universe has thrown me down a little,

so unexpectedly,

as if a slap to get me thinking and moving,

to get out of the comfort zone,

which was safe but pointless.

i tell myself,

if I die tomorrow,

all the nothings I’ve done till this day,

don’t satisfy me.

i will not exit with a smile.

here meant to do something with a meaning,

what I have believed since early age.

along the way that faith vanished,

it’s fighting back into me with a vengeance.

and I gladly welcome it.

for I wake up again feeling a purpose,

for I wake up again feeling useful,

for I wake up again feeling valuable,

for I wake up again feeling special,

for I wake up again feeling excited.

so when time comes for me to say goodbye to this world,
i will wave with a smile.