a child shivers in the cold.

life certainly has its funny way,

in turning one around.

may it be from down up,

or the other pitied way.

such uncontrollable power.

to feel alone,

in the surrounding of others.

to feel rich,

when nobody's around.

such far contradict.

like a child,

shivers in the cold.

walking ahead just because she has to,

to a bright future that really doesn't matter.

a too much never expected.

some few look up to her,

she asks why?

really nothing to be envy of,

quite an empty glass there.

just a bit of a soul left.

but she knows she knows,

things are not that shallow.

if not for herself,

at least her presence helps the others.

walking front when a blizzard comes.

this child shivers in the cold,

she asks to just let her.

for she wants to stay for her people.

a holiday greeting.

so here comes the holiday season of the year!

a season most people are waiting for.

though a small part of us around simply hate it.

never understood why but i know it's temporal.

but HAPPY HOLIDAYS for everybody anyways!

i wish you an even better year to come.

there's so much in life and it's grandly rich!

it was one of the busiest one for me,

so much went on.

career, personal, family, friends,

everything!

some overwhelmingly happy,

some truly hurtful,

but i am thankful for each and every moment of it.

and i believe it's bound to get even better next year!

God bless y'all.

God bless me.

God certainly blesses everybody!

Merry Christmas,

and Happy New Year!

*ps: I know I haven't post anything for so long, it's coming! All scribbled in my little notebook! :)

never logic, simply love.

it's not logic,
never been,
it's just love.

let's call his name 'a',
let's call her name 'b'.
in the distance and crowd,
he saw her,
an exhange of names was made.

up till about five months,
they had a paradise.
since the sea is never clear and calm,
a ridiculous storm came.
destroyed the heavenly beach.

but hey,
there's always a greener grass next door,
so they eloped.
a new start,
new fight that feels like a holiday.

a bright side in every darks,
one big thing they have in common,
so perfectly.
in every problems and worries,
if there's love it will conquer all.

it's never logic,
it's simply love.

is all needed.

it's like folder with sub folders,

minds can be proper divided.

perfectly created the most advanced,

equipped with the latest hardware.

it's how we develop the software in us.

uneasy thoughts do surface,

differs in the matter of what.

everybody has some,

to learn each day to rest it.

really does the magic.

suffice it to say,

endless happy makes it all.

with most ease,

resting doubts with certainties.

by itself finding solutions of its own.

it's the state of positive to keep,

rather than being dissolved in negatives.

it's by choice for real.

all around out there,

in people you love,

in places you love,

in everything you love.

taking a good look.

is all needed.

better reaching a best.

As days are proper, 

unplanned yet neat, 

I began to fall deeper and deeper, 

in love with it. 

Life as it is.  

Done all for self, 

no others. 

Seeing higher of self, 

learning to love more. 

Began to wonder others.  

Whether to believe, 

or taking as temporal noises. 

Wouldn't know now, 

only time will tell. 

As resuming this awesome life still.  

What if this is, 

enough just enough? 

There's no better deal. 

Or simply to let go, 

as this isn't the best?  

At the a new high of life, 

deserving no less than. 

The courage for decision, 

following a gut. 

A nature's way of telling.  

Simply from better reaching a best.

just us both.

never been so fluid,
and free letting myself out.
though very far,
your presence linger.
riding with me through the minutes.

one with furthest aims,
yet effortlessly great.
most comfortable one,
yet the best indeed.
ours ours ours to love.

being my rock through rocks,
being my confidant through confidentials,
you naturally are.
my trusted one,
i choose to build life with.

letting me fly,
free as a sparrow would.
still protecting much.
always having my back,
enduring all my lacks with endless patience.

you surfaced indeed when least expected,
for a ground with you that most expected,
through a lifetime.

just us both.

some like me.

some say,
money buy happiness.
not completely resting the idea,
some of the time true.
it calms you.

all comes down to,
a soul's purpose of living.
what matters most,
differs from one to one.
cats or dogs.

excuse me for my choice of comparison.

great chance you for asking,
what's my life's aim then?
not that great as some might assume,
not that shallow as some might assume.
honestly just yet magnificent.

the humble roof,
the one ultimate confidant,
the deepest desire,
the greatest love,
the little world of own.

sadly that have been abandoned,
by most.
however the most important for some.

some like me.

for the love of the whatever.

To first pursue a story,
Can sometimes with the wrong reasons.
However otherwise believed,
Some might be surprising.
Delicately loving.

To plan for a scheme,
Or infidelity will not be quite easy.
Anymore.

Faced with such luck,
Never to be destroyed.
Nor tempted by candies,
Or for exact,
Fictional fantasies.

Give and take.
Taken,
Now give back.

For a beautiful genuineness,
For a simple taking care,
For a fair compromise,
For a future sweet idealism,
For a big single reason of life.

For the love of the whatever interpreted.

only my own.

time is chasing you,
time is chasing you,
just the natural range,
or one you've set.
only your own.

embrace a breeze,
when there comes one.
dive into the hurricane,
a crucial balance.
only your own.

big part of living,
done all for the most important.
shall not be affectable,
by anything or anyone other.
only your own.

no one to rely on,
no one to rely on.
expectation in others disappoints.
only your own,
only your own.

only my own.

never judge a book by its cover.

has a gruesome life,

clouded your judgement?

losing all the ability to be honest,

leaving your heart cold.

sincere no more?

or is it,

education that ruined you.

such shame being borne with natural intelligence,

and charm.

yet so wrongly used.

perhaps too,

seen too much in life.

sucked it all in,

losing all trusts.

protecting too much?

whatever it is,

only one self would know.

never judge a book by its cover.

bad nor good.

going back home.

so it's my last breakfast here for this trip.

it was great!

had the trip i've always wanted.

same place for quite couple of times but this is by far the exact kind of bali escape i've always wished for.

i'd totally recommend Holiday Inn Resort, Baruna Bali (www.bali.holidayinn.com).

total pamper, the somewhat secluded beach area is at its best, getting absolutely everything you need in the premise alone does make you not want to leave the place throughout the trip!

room, facilities, and service is perfection.

ahh..can't wait for the next trip in November.

a million thanks @adilonln; one of the very few childhood mate i have and absolutely the best!

time to go back to life, family & friends, and my baby.

till the next, much love!

xx

all is alright.

can't quite figure out,
what all these are.

the unrecognized trust,
a natural faith.
that all gonna be just fine,
through each every bad.
unshakable.

the heaviest quake,
the biggest flood,
the driest drought,
the hottest flame.
might come before me.

somewhat all figured out,
went through or called for.
having this little belief,
posted me today.
the beautiful experiences.

all is alright.

few biggest wishes,
unreachable for now.
which when kept sincere,
shall all come to past.
and kept for a ravishing future.

bit by bit thus making life even more whole.

love one another.

when it's stride by stride,

yet thousands of it.

you can't help but wonder,

when are you going to reach a point.

the destination aimed.

there will always only be two picks.

to go on walking,

rests in between is fine.

temptations of a short-cut,

unfailingly present.

if done the right way,

satisfaction is invaluable.

to quit and surrender,

some might feel complacent of current.

most will edge in self pity,

seeing selfs as failures.

results in a permanent isolation,

just the most terrible poverty.

others to be affected without known.

freedom of own choices,

is what we are borne with.

however to be fed and filled with love,

starts from a happiness within.

a big obligation towards closest ones,

the grand way of giving back.

choose wise,

love one another.

for life is created good not to be destroyed.

forget but unforgotten.

Yesterday was a different day.

I lay here today at ease,
Drinking my old-fashioned Lemonade.
All doing the same around me,
Surely some with a mood otherwise.
Same reason.

An escape is just priceless,
To get away.
From well,
Or worse.
Little crunch time.

Tomorrow will still be the same.

Will do exactly what I do today,
Nothing.
Just be grateful,
Being here.
In a world I built within this canopy.

In which to go back to reality.

The brilliance of life,
Ridden innocently.
Ever unpredictable,
Led with patience and joy.
Wouldn't trade for anyone's.

What I know for now,
I'm laying here,
Still with my old-fashioned Lemonade.
With a chance of tranquil,
It's well alright.

Look forward to resume reality unforgotten.

a great good morning to all,

happy eid mubarak to all who celebrates.

i'm enjoying my short break here,

isolate myself whenever i want to.

friends are also around whenever,

walked on streets a lot!

it must have been the longest walk of my life yesterday!

anyways,

you'll be able to see what i've been writing here.

hope you guys will enjoy,

lemme know you're here.

'like' or share on fb, retweet, leave a comment,

subscribe too if you would.

much much love,

xx

ever thine, mine, and ours.

you may shatter me,

and it's not even a significance.

for now it's the time,

gifted for you and me.

to sow.

i may shatter you,

and it's not even a significance.

for soon to come,

rest of life for you and me.

to yield.

life may shatter us,

and it's not even a significance.

for the greatest journey,

is already yours and mine.

to keep.

ever thine, mine, and ours.

without a doubt.

today declared loud,

tomorrow retracted quietly.

way too weak of a thought,

for something this nefarious.

big mistake.

one man's reckless thought,

affects millions of minds.

nobody would know,

real reason why of such act.

however definitely not noble.

a threat to the antagonist,

greater shame for the protagonist.

loss for everybody,

only a win for the feign man.

the shallow sudden popularity.

it was not the religion,

that destroyed that day.

one God,

one people.

sadly plus a few cruel lost ones.

with no reason,

should a party be blamed as a whole.

for both sing the same hymns,

worship the same Father in heaven.

most importantly read the same Book.

only titled differently,

without a doubt.

gonna be leaving jakarta tomorrow morning,

to a rather secluded place (i hope secluded enough).

unwind from this sometimes-can-be-very-tiring-city,

will write and post soon!

xx

be still.

nature of every human,
never,
or to be fairer,
simply hard to be satisfied.
pretty much with everything.

sometimes we find,
we have no choice at all.
other times,
with one too many.
none feels good.

to choose,
based on doing the right thing,
should end the dilemma.
however doing it,
isn't so easy.

having a still heart,
doesn't come naturally.
at least not for me.
this time around i'm learning,
do wish me luck.

to be still.

exciting upcoming project!

very lucky me to know quite a few musicians in my life; will be collaborating with 2 of them exactly

(@hanzleo for one) with the things i write, and their music, of course.

more updates to come, but! so. very. excited!

xx

greetings!

so hello,

anybody that would be visiting here.

you might or not read my notes before,

been writing much on facebook,

guess it's time for a proper blog!

very excited,

do comment,

follow me on twitter (@erephael),

if otherwise,

thank you anyways!

note:  posts before this, they're imported from my facebook notes;

more to come above!

xx

the strength we have.

'simplicity both fond of,
hasn't been presenting itself.
start of this journey,
has been stoney.
just don't mind.

shall hope for the rain,
after this drought.
shall hope for the rainbow,
after this rain.
inevitably ours.

and through it,
till a conclusion.
got only one another,
else in world might close on us.
yet perfect still.

faith for each,
ever full.
smile through darkness,
rejoice to victory.
holding on to a trust.

end shall be lavish,
side by side.
together grasping,
on a stare so profound.
just yours and mine.

started from the strength we have.

no other.

'im terrified because,
i love you.
the heart aches,
while all is perfect.
what will be the end.

take it slow,
roller coaster.
im overwhelmed,
none ability left.
for an ounce of control.

it is so free,
i feel trapped.
all too good,
grew a fear of lost.
save me.

my weaks,
you cover in strength.
my disbeliefs,
you cover in faith.
each time you're here.

unfailingly,
winning me over and over.
left no coward,
again and again.
the bold you're teaching me.

im all here,
nothing else looked for.
because you're perfect,
just the one.
all doubts made vanished.

thank you for teaching me love.

good, i surely hope.

'as nature is evermore revealed,
we see more ingenuity around us.
keep telling ourselves,
'see the best in people'.
but what if that's not valid no more?

not choosing it,
but feel enveloped,
in a tiny cage,
with no room to breathe.
ever terrifying.

thus then,
some get dismissed,
then taking part in it.
to just have a hope,
protecting themselves.

the little weaks,
by right truest ones,
left out in fear.
trying to go on the path,
tip-toeing to places.

as gone around,
with calendars flipping through years.
faces and,
behaviors of people,
have surely changed.

it did change,
became worse.
continue changing,
hopefully another time for the better,
is coming soon.

whatever hope left,
borderline successfully retained,
will it be something good,
or plain naive?
only time will tell.

im keeping mine.

this night.

'incredibly annoyed,
however,
had a chance to watch.
some unrealistic,
yet existing human behaviors.

everybody has their own,
i am sure.
its the level of peculiarity,
that differs.
singular in its own ways.

some few bands of friends,
done having their liquors.
acting big,
talking loud.
like they are kings and queens.

infuriating.

a squad of valet drivers,
agreeing the above downgrades.
first and second prioritizing,
according to some brands.
how sad.

i drive a honda city so what?

oh world,
eat me alive.
i have my wrongs,
certainly far from perfect.
luckily left with principles.

but what if being right,
ain't enough?
but what if being wrong,
taken stylish?
can't help but wonder.

back to them,
who are surely asleep by now.
waking up tomorrow,
feeling in hell.
they're just running.

merely escaping,
from what this world has become.
covering their truths,
to simply,
buy few hours of beautiful.

indefinitely.

while we breathe, we hope.

'life has endless lessons,
deeper each time.
many stages,
more beautiful each time.
infinitely.

as one great man says,
while we breathe,
we hope.
for all the best things,
that's yet to come.

never losing faith,
ventures are of course,
a package.
while learning to let go,
what needs to be.

with all grace.

all that was thought,
valuable.
can turn otherwise.
therefore never to settle,
for less than desired.

refrain,
draining to logic everything.
some are plainly not.
be true,
to the heart given.

simply put.

while we breathe,
we hope.
while we breathe,
we hope.
for the best that's yet to come.

*quoted from Barack Obama's 'While we breathe, we hope'.

thanks, but no thanks.

'excuse me,
for wondering.
the world,
the people,
been evolving in the weirdest way.

is it caused by education?
is it caused by idealism?
is it caused by ego?
is it caused by fear?
is it caused by pride?

not too sure.

a tainted thought,
of the classic life.
idealism,
has been a favorite word and thought.
at least for me.

wise to foolish.
kind to vile.
mindful to blind.
optimist to skeptic.
lovers to strangers.

what a waste.

a drifter becomes cool.
an arrogant becomes cool.
a player becomes cool.
an ignorant becomes cool.
a rascal becomes cool.

slowly but sure,
all are made believe.
the hard facts above,
then be addicted,
to little white lies.

how senseless.

must all learn to be,
fakes?
must all learn to be,
hypocrites?
must all learn to be all those things?

to deserve happiness,
to deserve success,
to deserve loyalty,
to deserve love,
to deserve life.

oh thanks, but no thanks.

it just gets better!

'a bird,
can fly up high.
then finds itself,
having to rest on a ground.
always.

us humans,
can look up high.
find ourselves enjoy being,
mandate to remember the ground.
always.

happiness,
is evermore.
sadness,
is temporal.
sadly often viewed otherwise.

a mountain,
has its ups and down ways.
seen from afar,
tip is most magnificent.
definitely.

us humans,
walk through easy and tough days.
seen from afar,
purpose is most magnificent.
definitely.

best is yet to come,
persist on our own.
stumbles and drawbacks along,
are standard procedures.
aim to be retained.

life then has nowhere else to go,
it just gets better!
at the tip of that mountain,
remember the ground.
that was where it all started.

be thankful.